Youth Development Autobiography

I never liked kids. I am the youngest of my siblings, I had never held a baby until I was 23. I used to say I was extremely afraid of kids, and somehow they would be attracted to me. They would come with their big eyes and crazy needs and comments. I just couldn't take it. When I graduated from college I got a job as a soccer coach. It was the only thing I had experience on. For my biggest fear, my boss asked me to work in this program called "Sweet Feet". It was my worse nightmare. I had to coach any soccer for 2-8 years old kids. I did an awful job in the beginning, I couldn't talk to them, everything was so hard, it was exhausting. Each session only last for 45 minutes but it was the longest 45 minutes of my life. However, my boss was the kindest person ever. At some point I started coaching older kids and slowly moving up the ladder. Then finally, I felt in LOVE (pic bellow of my first tournament).

It was like I meant to be there. They brought back my passion for the sports and daily taught me how to be a better person. I have been coaching  for four years now and I had the luck to have the best mentors and bosses ever. They taught me about development and educating human beings. The importance of professionalism and organization. Taught me how to be patient with kids and understand that we, as educator, have no clue whats going on their lives, and we should try our hardest not to take personal. My life now is all about my little humans.

Guess what? 3 years later I could finally run a program for 6-8 years old ( the age I fear the most)!! We rock! I couldn't had done that if I didnt have my mentors to constantly guide me.

"Mauer im Kopf" - The Playwork Primer (Wilson, P. 2010)

"The wall in the Head"

What risks are we actually denying to our kids?! Is risky even bad thing?

Listening to "Risks and Childhood" podcast where Amy Fusselman talks about childhood risks through the leans of playgrounds, I can't help myself on realizing I havent actually payed that much attention on nowadays playground. Although I am not THAT old, and taking consideration I come from a sub developed country, playgrounds still looks like this for me:

Probably not black and white image for me.. I can't see this picture and not make a bet on how how long is gonna take until someone falls down and hit their head in that ramp?!!?!?! What happened to me? or as the listener of the podcast added, I am also "regulating all the fun in the playground because I don't want a lawsuit"?! How much can we change our minds about what is safe and what is not, or what is risk and what is not. I really enjoy listening Amy talking about this argument of risky versus fun, and the fear of dying while playing in a play ground. Not to mention her observation about the lack of signs or the need of signs like this:

I believe that in past were stronger. Not only physically but also mentally stronger in result of the risk they took. As Wilson asked the reader to go back to our childhood and think about our most vivid childhood memories of play, and he says "chances are you were playing outside with no adults present" (pg. 10). I would add "... also in a very risky and memorable environment". Perhaps now we are creating a super secure playing environment but also all weak-natured from overly caring.

"I am not going to sit on the grass. There's dirt under there" (pg. 9)

Regardless of biophobia or this untouched child mentality. Is this really acceptable? 

Is there any other way to play with not getting dirty and being outside? Having this type of thought make me a little bit more opened about the concept and the introduction of a "Playwork". I agreed with Wilson, "the playworker are aware that in an ideal world they should not need to exist" (pg. 8). Reading majority of his pages, I still struggled to accept the whole idea of playworker. Although, the author does a fantastic job describing and exampling what a playworker is and what role they have or can have in the society. I still did not believe this is necessary. Then I started researching pictures of modern playground and I saw this:

 I know its a computer fake pic, and of course, probably trying to sell the idea of the playground. This pic, instead of making me feel safe and happy with the advance technology and the awareness of possible dangerous hidden in the old style playground, I look to it and make me want to leave?! Its like one of this things in life you would probably do it just because the rest of the world is doing as well (like watching Game of Thrones). 

I don't feel excited looking at this. It could easily look fake just be like this legos here...

It sounds/seems/smells equally boring. 

Perhaps, we do need to adjust to the difficulties globalization and civilizations brought to us, and this includes the way we guide our kids to play. I like the description Wilson made of playworker role "This means that playworkers do not try to educate, train, tame, or therapeutically treat children in their time and space of play", and they are there just to help the kids to have the best time that they can, maximizing the short time they have, and maybe squeeze a little bit from their raw creativity and their lack of imagination that unfortunately kids now have. 

Excuse me, open your head and let me play. 

This whole attitude towards what adolescent is suppose to act and/or how children suppose to play, almost telling kids that playing is wrong. Making kids more antisocial and extremely connected to their materialistic and static world. Wilson quotes Lindsey Hanley analyzing the "Mauer I'm Kopf" expression, and how this fear and this controlling system build walls of limits of what we believe is possible of and for ourselves, which the expression translates "the wall in the head". In my head, playing means freedom and freedom means flying (... who never?) in the playground.

Framing Youth: Writing ‘Youth’ in Social Context. Bogad, L (2002).

We are constantly changing. Psychology, physiology, biology, spiritually, astrology (and any other ology ) all have their generalized stages and phases that humans go through (or should go through) in life. The chapters presented from Dr. Bogad book gives us a great deal about questioning youth framing or, I would say, youth labeling; or Dr. Bogad quoted from Hine (1999): "The artificial concept of teenager".

Although I would love to talk about so many different topics after reading her chapter, I keep thinking about this expression: "The Artificial Concept of Teenager".  Just like Delpit argued in her chapters about rules and code from the "Culture of Power", I can't stop thinking if adolescents and the whole adolescents being vulnerable, angry, insecure, hormone boobs, and/or arrogant may be just another part of the social power norms. Well said in the book, the society is ignoring social, cultural, and material contexts; additionally, restating dominant ideas about how adolescent should be or should act according to white middle-class boys experiences. Dr. Bogad finishes saying "thus, the familiar characterizations of adolescence are, in fact, about race and class." (pg. 7).

Relying on what we already know is merely reproducing what we already know. 

I was talking to my best friend this week, and she was watching some video of charity work in Mozambique. The video was about orphan kids, who their parents happens to die when they are really young and there is no support for them. Consequently, kids are living by themselves when they are teenagers 12-14 years old ( Watch the video of Childs Life in Africa  ). Another example is the movie Lion, where the kid tried to survive at age 5 in the streets of India. The movie showed a shocking reality of many streets kids in extremely scarcity situation ( Please, watch this video about the reality of kids in Mumbai).

"Different voices carry different weights" (pg. 2)

I am not denying the existence of hormone changes or the difficulties that adolescents go through. I am just wondering if the society did not imply acceptable behaviors or expectations to certain ages shaping concepts and/or common mystique. Perhaps, if you leave the american culture environment you couldn't apply the same concept or ideas.

Youth Workers - Seven is the magical number

An Educational Practice

Educating young people is a practice and a learning process not only for young people, but definitely to youth worker. It requires different approaches to adjust to each individual to create a trustful relationship between worker and young. As a youth soccer coach, I try to be aware of differences between players. Players can come from different level of skills, can have different personalities, can have different believes when comes to soccer, can go through different issues at home, can be in a different growth phase... So many things to take as consideration before approach the player as a personal and as a player. The informal education the book talks about is definitely part of my philosophy as a coach, where I try to influence the players to think and live the game throughout different opportunities and activities, and hopefully bringing the learning and mentality to the real world.

Social Practice

The social practices is focused in the idea that young people generally is more open to learn and trust when they can relate to their peers. I truly believe this extremely important when young people has a visual and close example of what they would like to become. Youth workers have the opportunity of being not only an educator but also an idol for young people. I use my personal experience in the daily basis in my work. It is nice to see young players trusting your work and dreaming to be similar to you.

Social Justice

Getting out of the bubble, and being aware of social injustice, but more important, the youth worker have the ability to promote ethical attitudes, and sense of community. As the book mentioned, this characteristic of youth worker is crucial and important for the society and a whole. Youth worker should be able to lead as an example, not oppressing, intimidate, or exclude. Helping to improve young people's ability to reflect and critical analyzing situations. My personal case, my goal is to learn and teach how to respect other through the sports. Music and sport have this beautiful and magical thing that bring us together and breaks prejudices and discriminations.

Young people should be involved

This part of the book, they talk about how nice would be if young people was involved in youth work voluntarily. However, young people tends not to attend less formal youth groups/clubs/work as much they would if it was school or places that they are compelled to attend. Instead of fighting the willing of young people to attend less formal environment, why not improving the work making a "distinc and positive contributions" at the places they are compelled to attend. That is why my job is so important. In theory, young people comes to soccer practices voluntarily. They make friends and they enjoy being there. If we are able to create a healthy and consciousness environment, where players are also involved in the community and developing as young leaders. I believe this could be great.

The huge influence
"Empowerment, participation, active citizenship and democratic engagement", the book mention this as influences the youth work can potentially have in the young community throughout their value work. Youth worker can help young people understand their role in the society and give them power as well.



Holistically and welfare practice


This part of the book talks about the difficulty having a pre-determined welfare-oriented goals and the actually promotion of informal education. Especially when working in different agency context. Youth work should take in considerations that these people are young, and majority of the times they cannot control their environment or their influences, which causing a lot challenges in their lives. The book talks about that it is possible to have a balance between education goals and welfare interventions, and being able to also have an positive impact in the community.

Who is this girl?

Who?

Hey, my people.
If you have any curiosity to know who I am feel free to read this awesome bomb I will throw to you. If you do not care to know who is writing this blog, just skip to the next paragraph (I promise I will not take this personal). My name is Nadima Skeff, but I would rather be called "Skeff" or "Skeffy". Although I believe my last name is pretty legit, the only reason why I am asking you to refer to me as Skeff is because 7 years ago when I moved to United State of America from Brazil, no one could say my first name. Skeff sounds like Steff, so Skeff it is forever! As I mentioned, I am originally from Brasil, moved here when I was 20 years old after getting a full ride to play soccer in a University in Georgia. Back in the days, soccer pretty much meant everything in my life. I spent my whole life playing soccer. It was my priority and nothing could keep me away form the ball. I battled against prejudice and any type of obstacles you can imagine. I was fortunate to play in the Womens National Team and even more fortunate to come play in America, where women soccer is a big deal. I played 3 years in School, as athlete I become an All America player and recently inducted to Armstrong State University Hall of Fame. As student, well.. not as exciting, I graduated in Health Sciences (boring, I know!). Once I was out of school, no idea what to do besides soccer. I decided to start coaching. Eventually, I got a Master in Kinesiology in Sports Nutrition which it has helped me tremendously in my work.


What are you up to?

Currently and for the last four years, I have been lucky enough to coach soccer for living. I find it fascinating and one of the best jobs in the world (if you dont agree, please, dont kill my vibe). Spend pretty much everyday of my week (including holidays) teaching , mentoring, and learning from tiny human beings. If I could I would only spend the time of my life with animals and kids. Summarizing, what am I up to? having the best time of my life in a daily basis.

"Learning is the only thing that the mind never exhaust, never fears, and never regrets" Leonardo da Vinci

After spending beautiful days down in Savannah, Georgia, I ended up in the cold snowy oystery Newport, RI. My style of coaching start changing. Although I am very intrigued about the physiology part of the game, I started to be more curious about the educational/psycological/leadership part of coaching. Dealing with so many different personalities, and NEVER giving up in any of my crazy creatures that I called "players", I realized I needed more than just physiology to make them the best they could be. Coaching goes beyond the four white lines, I am very happy to find a school with education background that has also focus in youth development. I am very passionate about coaching and helping "my kids" as much as I can. I believe these kids teach me so much, and I just hope I can reciprocate the same to them.



Cool... Do you do anything else though?

YES!!! Since I stopped playing, I decided to get out of this grass bubble that I lived from so long. I do yoga in daily basis, and I am super into exercising, wall climb, read, and eat like a pig. When I am not busy with any of these things, I spend all my free time with my MVP Ronaldo- my cat, my life, the reason of my existence (yes, he has a soccer player's name).